We like to complain

Probably it is not only due to our culture, but people like to complain. This helps us to connect with others, avoid responsibilities, or to excuse a failure.

We complain when we feel there is a significant gap between an expectation and reality (says Guy Winch). When we complain, we want to fix injustice, but do not confuse it with venting.

Because we do not complain too much, it is better to complain constructively:

  • Start to ask yourself if it is worth it? Don’t spend your energy complaining too much.
  • Pause for a few seconds to regain from complaining
  • Put some positive statements between your complaints (remember the “sandwich” technique from feedback)
  • Understand your emotions and express this more than complaining
  • Turn the complaint into a request

When we are doing this, it is good for our emotional health.

In the end, take a look at what can happen if you stop complaining: here.


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